Attentiveness and Respect

My pastor shared the following on the church's Facebook page a few weeks ago.

We talked last Sunday in worship about the compassion of Christ that we are called to emulate. This is a great meditation on the topic.

These are excerpts from "How Not to Be Alone" in The New York Times Sunday Review. The piece is by Jonathan Safran Foer, a novelist who delivered the 2013 commencement address at Middlebury College, from which the essay was adapted:

Simone Weil wrote, “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.”

By this definition, our relationships to the world, and to one another, and to ourselves, are becoming increasingly miserly.

....everyone is always in need of something that another person can give, be it undivided attention, a kind word or deep empathy. There is no better use of a life than to be attentive to such needs. There are as many ways to do this as there are kinds of loneliness, but all of them require attentiveness, all of them require the hard work of emotional computation and corporeal compassion.

We often use technology to save time, but increasingly, it.... makes the saved time less present, intimate and rich.

Being attentive to the needs of others might not be the point of life, but it is the work of life. It can be messy, and painful, and almost impossibly difficult.

I have been struggling lately with feelings I could not quite pinpoint.  When I read the last two sentences, I figured out what I was feeling . . . disrespected.  After reading those last two sentences, now I feel . . . guilty for thinking of myself instead of others. 

Let me explain.  In one area of my personal life, I feel left-out, unwanted, forgotten.  I used to be very involved with a group of people, but due to some decisions, things have changed, and we communicate rarely or only when needed, which is a far-cry from communicating numerous times a day like we once did. This may sound silly, but it has completely changed my life, and I have had a hard time processing the changes.  When I read those last two sentences, I realized that being attentive is who I am.  I am all about the details, but I can also see the big picture.  No matter where I am or whom I am with, I pay attention to others' needs and wants.  I do whatever I can to make sure others are comfortable, have what they need/want, and assist them however needed. 

Not everyone is like this, and as each day passes, it becomes more and more obvious.  I was getting to the point of asking, "What's the point? Why try?" I linked this lack of communication and behavior of others as being disrespectful to me. 

After reading this, I know that I should continue to be attentive, care about others, and do what is best for others despite how I am treated or feel.  Yes, my life has become "messy, and painful, and impossibly difficult," but I will continue to be who I am and do for others even when they do not do for me.  It is the right thing to do.