Beautiful Disaster

In the wee hours this morning, I finished Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire.  Once I started it when I crawled into bed last night, I knew I was not going to put it down until I finished it. Good book!

Check out this synopsis on Goodreads.

This is the book description from Amazon.com.

Book Description

Release date: August 14, 2012

 

The new Abby Abernathy is a good girl. She doesn’t drink or swear, and she has the appropriate number of cardigans in her wardrobe. Abby believes she has enough distance from the darkness of her past, but when she arrives at college with her best friend, her path to a new beginning is quickly challenged by Eastern University’s Walking One-Night Stand.

Travis Maddox, lean, cut, and covered in tattoos, is exactly what Abby wants—and needs—to avoid. He spends his nights winning money in a floating fight ring, and his days as the ultimate college campus charmer. Intrigued by Abby’s resistance to his appeal, Travis tricks her into his daily life with a simple bet. If he loses, he must remain abstinent for a month. If Abby loses, she must live in Travis’s apartment for the same amount of time. Either way, Travis has no idea that he has met his match.

The Lost Years

Last night, I finished The Lost Years by Mary Higgins Clark.  My office-mates/friends had given me this mystery months ago for my birthday, but I had not made the time to read it until now.  One friend told me that she kept paper and pencil nearby to help her keep track of all the characters as she read b/c there are always so many in her books.  Well, I didn't need paper and pencil, but she was right.  There were many characters to keep straight (there were at least 14).  It was a good book that had you questioning motives, if the detectives were right, if you had missed a detail somewhere, and led you straight up to the climactic ending.  I figured out "who done it" before it was revealed, but that was fine.  I had to be sure I was right! 

I liked that it had a Christian/Religious twist to it and included information surrounding the lost parchment from Christ to Joseph of Arimathea.

Family and Laughter

My Great Aunt and cousin have been helping Mom and me clean out Granny's house.  We work a few hours a day as long as Mom feels like it.  I do most of the lifting and moving since they cannot.  I hand them boxes and bags to go through while I go through my own, and then I take out the trash or recycling once we've sorted out what we want to keep, give to someone, donate, or to put in the garage sale.  Anyone in the family that wants something just needs to say what they want, and we will give it to them as long as no one else has claimed it. 

My Great Aunt brought her daughter, son, and daughter-in-law over this evening to "shop."  (Her other son and wife have already been "shopping" as this is the daughter-in-law who is helping us.)  Her daughter was looking for these little figurines she remembers playing with when visiting her Aunt (Granny) as a child. Her daughter-in-law was looking for anything she can use in her classroom.  After shopping and visiting for a bit, we all went over to my Great Aunt's house to visit.  They all had milkshakes, and we just went to visit.

I have not laughed that hard in a long time--especially with family.  My Great Aunt had all three children there and all but one spouse.  They told stories, remembered events from years ago, and laughed at themselves and each other.  They were so funny, and it felt so good to not only laugh but to watch the dynamics of this group.  They get together as often as they can.  Every time they get together, they laugh and truly enjoy each others' company, and they support one another and their children.  

My Great Uncle passed away at the end of April, and since then, her three children have been there every step of the way.  They make sure she eats each night, gets her hair done on Saturdays, makes it to/from work, and so much more.  They take turns taking care of/checking on her and working in her yard. She isn't a burden on them or an issue that is impacting their lives, but someone they truly enjoy visiting and being around.

I'm not doing a good job really explaining the atmosphere tonight or what it really felt like to experience this evening of fun, talking, and laughter, but I know it is something I truly miss and something I truly pray for my children (if I have any). 

Happy Birthday. Granny!

Today would have been Granny's 90th birthday. 

She loved birthdays--hers and others'. She loved cake, cookies, and all kinds of sweets.  She loved everyone getting together to visit, laugh, and be silly.

Today, she celebrated with Jesus and everyone who has gone before her.

Happy Birthday, Granny!

The Real Number of Hours Teachers Work in One Eye-Opening Graphic

Interesting read . . .

The Real Number of Hours Teachers Work in One Eye-Opening Graphic by Brandon Weber

What are your thoughts?

The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry

While in a road trip last Friday, I read The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry. The church Ladies' Group is reading it to discuss next month, so I thought 5 hrs in the car was the perfect time to tackle it.

The book is set in England, and I loved learning new words and phrases associated with the British English. A map was provided at the beginning of the book to help you trace his steps from the southern tip of Great Britain to the northern area. I really liked this. I love England, and I could relate to parts of his trip since I had traveled to the London area a few times.

As I write this, I do not have the book in front of me to check my details, but I'm not off much, and any mistakes won't change what I mean.

Harold, a retired gentleman in his 60s, set out to mail a letter, but he decided, on a whim, to just keep walking by the mailboxes and post offices to deliver the letter in person. As the story unfolds, you learn why seeing this person in person is so important and why the walking is the best form of transportation.

On his journey, he met various people who helped him in different ways, taught him life lessons, helped him to see life differently, and supported him as he focused and was determined to get to his final destination.

He had plenty of time to think about life, his job, his wife, his son, his friends and neighbors, regrets, accomplishments, and so much more. He remembered happy memories as well as sad, including terrible memories he really didn't want to recall. He processed everything from his childhood to adolescence to marriage to parenthood to retirement. He had a lot of time to think. He processed everything he had not processed before, saw things in a new light, and came out in the end "a new man" ready to face the rest of his life.  In the end, I believe he had over 80+ days to think, remember, and process.

Have you taken the time to think, remember, and process your life? Have you had a major change in your life that forced you to think and process, even if you didn't want to do it? How did you feel?

With the big life changes I have had these last two years, I have had time to reflect.  More so in the last 13 months. While Harold thought through his memories and processed things that had happened, there were times he would have a memory and push it away, but it would come back, and he eventually did process it. It I have a memory or thought I don't want to process, I just keep pushing it away. It hurts to process those thoughts. My biggest issue is that I can process and deal with my role or thoughts. I have terrible trouble or more pain when dealing with others, their actions, their thoughts, why they are the way they are, why they do/did what they do/did. Memories or problems that have me asking, "Why?" are the most difficult. In the end, the final decisions have little to do with me, but they hurt nonetheless, and I can't do anything about it.

Just Be

Today's Sermon: Luke 10: 38-42

³⁸ As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. ³⁹ She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. ⁴⁰ But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
⁴¹ “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, ⁴² but few things are needed—or indeed only one.^[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

I liked today's message.  Pastor Cheryl put a shawl on her head and talked as if she were Martha.  Then she put the shawl around her shoulders and talked as if she were Mary.  Then she removed it all together and talked as if she was Jesus.  It was neat how she did it.

Martha was the doer, and Mary was portrayed as the slacker.  However, in this scripture, Mary "gets it," and Martha does not.  Sometimes we need to quit "doing" and just "be."  Mary was "present" with Jesus while Martha was busy with all the tasks, cooking, preparation, etc. She was too busy to be "present."

We shouldn't work or be busy 24/7/365.  We need to take time to "be" and be "present."




Since hearing this sermon, I have been working to "be."  I already work hard to make sure I am "present" wherever I am--with family, at work, with friends, etc. This sermon has helped me to work hard to clear my mind of all the conversations I play over and over and just "be" with a clear, uncluttered mind, working to find "me" and see what might be in my future.

Posting on Social Media

Anyone who has met me in the last 2 years has not gotten to know or work with the "me" that existed before.  I have, and do realize, that I have been more negative, sad, and uncertain than ever before.  I am working to change that b/c it does bother me, and I want to be "me." I have thought how anyone reading this blog would not find it fun, uplifting, or helpful.  I need to change that! Especially since I set-off to enlighten, share ideas, and learn from others.

I just read 5 Things a Blessed Mom Should Consider Before Posting on Social Media by Hevyn Allen. She makes some very good points and has my mind whirling.

I hardly ever actually post a status update on Facebook.  If I wish someone Happy Birthday, I do it by sending a message.  I "like" pictures, quotes, and posts, but I really just peruse it to see what others are doing or to keep up with those I don't see often enough. (I am very particular about who I "friend," so I actually know everyone in my Friend List and can hear their voices and/or see their faces when I read their posts.)

I have a Twitter account, but I hardly ever go to Twitter to see what's going on in the world. That piece of social media just hasn't caught on with me yet.

I like blogging b/c it does allow me to think and process.  For those who truly know me, they know that I don't like sharing my feelings, talking about things that are too private, discussing anything that makes me cry, or writing/journaling.  Blogging, positive or negative, has allowed me to process thoughts and ideas, document activities or events, and share some things with the world that I hope have been helpful.

Anyway, I think I will consider, think about, and process the blog I read today and see where it leads me.

Cleaning Out a House

When a loved one passes away, what have you done with their belongings?

Mom and I have been cleaning out my grandmother's house along with my Great Aunt and cousin.  We only spend a few hours a day when we do work b/c it is a little overwhelming. We began in one room and have worked our way through the house.  We have been through almost everything at this point with just a few spots/cabinets left.  We have found all kinds of things--some we remember, some that brought back memories, some that brought about stories new to me, some that were flat out trash, and some are items that someone else will have better use.  Now that we have been through everything, we have begun sorting and setting up for a garage or estate sale. We have donated many items. We've put a few other non-sellable or non-giveaway items on the curb. We've had tons of trash and items to recycle.

We have kept personal items that we want ourselves or to pass to the great grandchildren, but there is so much more.

Tips:
1. When you take pictures, be sure you label each one with a name and date.  Location would be nice too.  Granny always did that, and now we know who all the people are back to great, great grandparents.
2. Start cleaning now.  Don't leave a house of stuff for your loved ones to sort through and about which to make decisions.
3. Make sure there is a Will and that it is exactly what the deceased wanted and someone knows the wishes and carry them out.
4. Record family members telling stories.  Granny used to tell stories all the time, and now I wish we had recorded them.
5. Give yourself plenty of time to go through things and make decisions.

With Whom You Surround Yourself

Earlier this week, a young up-and-coming Hollywood star was found dead in his hotel room.  He has battled drug abuse for many years, and sadly, we have learned it was involved in his death.  As I have read the many articles on his life and death, one thing keeps coming to mind.

He is seen entering his hotel room at 2:15 am after being out with "friends." Later, "friends" was changed to "unidentified individuals."

Here is my thought . . .
Why did he surround himself with people that might partake in the things he was trying to quit? 
Why didn't the people he surrounded himself with try to make sure he stayed clean?
Don't friends try to help friends stay clean and help them make better decisions?

I realize there are many different scenarios that could lead to these people not knowing his demons or he could have gotten the drugs after leaving their presence, but . . .

I am so grateful that my friends have my best interests at heart and treat me with the utmost respect.  I am so grateful for the people with whom God has surrounded me.

Chiari Malformation

Five years ago today, niece underwent brain surgery for Chiari Malformation. Her brain was slowly slipping backward or lower in her skull putting pressure at the base of the skull and neck.  She had severe headaches that were debilitating. 

Her doctors were amazing, and as soon as we mentioned her symptoms at a well check-up, they immediately started some tests and knew the answer in days.  Surgery was within months. 

What amazed me was that within 2-3 days of brain surgery, she was up and about, jumping from couch to couch, etc. 
Since her diagnosis, I have learned that there are many people who suffer from CM, but they struggle to be diagnosed b/c doctors know so little about it. There can be various levels of pain and severity of CM, and symptoms can resemble many other disorders/diseases.

While she had surgery, this is not something you "get over."  She will live with it forever.  Yearly check-ups will keep an eye on how things are going.  She may never need surgery again. She might in a few years.  We just don't know.

She is an amazing little girl, and I love her to pieces! 

Cursing

Do you curse/cuss? Do you do it in private? Only around friends? Around family? In front of your children?

A few weeks ago, an acquaintance said she had gone to see a movie.  One of the characters in the movie cursed and cursed.  She said she didn't like the cursing, but the movie was hilarious.

This got me to thinking . . .

Do you mind if a movie is filled with cursing? Do you not watch specific movies or shows because of the cursing? Could you enjoy a movie if every other word was a curse word?

When I was in high school, if anyone around me cursed, I would say, "Not in my presence."  I didn't have to say it very often.  Everyone with whom I surrounded myself knew not to curse around me.  I greatly appreciate their respect for me.

Last year, I read an article where someone had found, through research, that people tend to curse more when they are stressed. I completely agree when it comes to me.  I can count the number of curse words I have said out loud in someone else's presence on one hand.  I don't like cursing, and I don't like people doing it in front of me, so I try to control what I say. Well, I need to start considering "crap" a curse word and stop using it.  I'm working on it.  :-)  That is my one go-to word.  Anyway, I have thought many curse words, and I think them when I am stressed.

I also believe cursing does not show class.  Someone can be dressed very nicely, doing an amazing job, but as soon as they start talking and cursing, I'm done.  I know that is terribly judgmental, but that is how I feel.

Our children today do not understand how inappropriate cursing is.  Partially because they hear it from their families and from movies, television, and video games. At school, I get onto students when I hear them curse.  I simply give them that "teacher look" or say, "Watch your mouth."  9 times out of 10, they have no idea that they cursed.  It has become second nature for them.

My challenge to you: Try to go without saying a curse word a whole day.  Then go a week.  See if you can do it.  I'll work on not saying "crap."  Try helping our children today to get their language under control.

Smiling and Depression

I just saw this article by Joyce Meyer.
Smiling is Serious Business!

When I began reading, I thought she would share ways to overcome depression or something along that line.  What I found was that she suggests smiling to bring joy to yourself and others and to push the negative, depressive stuff away.

She shared that her difficult circumstances made her a more serious person who had to work on smiling more and being more joyous.  I find that I smile and appear that nothing is wrong when in reality I don't want to be wherever I am or when I am dealing with serious disappointment, sadness, and disrespect.

Anniversary of Healthy Choices

One year ago today, one of my dearest friends and I joined Curves.  It was the second time around for both of us, but we decided this was it.  We would go every day possible until school started, and then once school began, we would meet each other there as much as we could.

One year later, I have lost . . . 30 pounds and 4 sizes!  I am excited about what I have been able to do and how much energy I have now. 

I truly wish it were more, but I can't compare myself to others.  I know someone who has lost 100 pounds in a year and others have lost 50-60 in a year and someone who lost 50 in 6 months. No one has walked in my shoes, gone through what I have, and struggled with the same struggles. 

We began working out 5-6 times a week.  Then it dwindled to 3-4 times a week. Then there were weeks I made it in there once or possible not at all.  My work schedule/duties and family obligations made my schedule crazy, but I did what I could to get to Curves as much as I could.

I used to be a "pasta-a-day" girl.  If I had a frozen meal for lunch, it involved pasta.  If I got to choose the restaurant, it was probably Italian.  Now, I hardly ever eat pasta, and if I do, I eat wheat pasta.

I am a very picky eater, but I have managed to add a few new foods to my choices--asparagus, broccoli, and carrots.

We used to eat out b/c we had a lot of evening activities or no one wanted to cook.  Eating out makes me gain fairly quickly, so we limit our eating out.  Now, I make better choices about what I eat when we do go out.  I might get a sandwich or burger, but I don't eat the fries or chips.  If I can substitute the fries/chips for apples, I will.  I eat a lot of grilled chicken sandwiches now.  I might get a child's portion. When I go to restaurants, I make healthier choices and try to eat only half of the portion.  I will split portions with Mom too.

I drink water at restaurants, unsweetened tea (with an artificial sweetener) at home, and diet soda or unsweetened tea (with an artificial sweetener) at fast food places.  I don't have soda at home or work.

There tends to be a lot of candy, sweets, or snacks in teachers' lounges and around schools.  I cut out eating anything other than what I personally took for lunch or the cashews or almonds I had for snacks.

I have
-a protein shake for breakfast,
-try to fit in a snack of nuts mid-morning,
-lunch, which is smaller and healthier than I used to take,
-try to remember another healthy snack mid-afternoon, and then I have
-dinner, which we are trying to make healthier and include plenty of veggies.

I am still working on portion control with dinner and keeping my meals healthy.

I don't count calories, but I do try to watch my carbohydrate intake.

I've been struggling the last week and a half, so I hope to get it together and continue to lose.  It is hard work that takes dedication.